Rob’s Update: A Small Unregarded Yellow Sun

Week 47 of 2019

Greetings all

It’s been a pretty good week here in Rob-land. I should have anticipated, by the way, that I probably wouldn’t do a mag review or an interview this week because of the holiday. I’ll do some next week.

However, I caught up on a number of small projects. I’ll expand on that in January. I also sent off another short story. This too I’ll talk about more in January.

I also started a bit of whimsy that I will tell you about when it’s ready.

With all that was going on, I didn’t really look at None Call Me Mother much. I plan on writing a goodly amount over the weekend and all next week.

Of course, though, I spent a lot of time this week getting ready for Thanksgiving. We finished the great room and I spent a goodly amount of time putting books back into place.

Yesterday was, in general, a great day. Thanksgiving included the sweetie, her daughter, my mom, and a couple of friends. We ate a goodly amount.

Today was a lot of recovery and mostly lazing about. Still, I hope to get some writing in tonight.

What I’m Listening To

More college football. This time it’s South Florida v. Central Florida. Yes, I like football, even when I don’t care about the two teams in question.

Quote of the Week

I’m feeling silly, so you get something from Douglas Adams.

“Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the western spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow sun. Orbiting this at a distance of roughly ninety-two million miles is an utterly insignificant little blue green planet whose ape-descended life forms are so amazingly primitive that they still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea.”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

News and Works in Progress

  • None Call Me Mother (76,951)
  • CB (8,418)
  • SK (706)

Recent Blog Posts and Wiki Additions

I didn’t do anything this week, but I’ll get back into it all next week.

Upcoming Events

Spotlight

This week’s spotlight is on that amazing prime rib I made yesterday and the even tastier mashed potatoes. Nom.

Today’s Weight: 394.4

Updated Word Count: 205,217

Shijuren Wiki: 874 entries

Let me know if you have any suggestions on the website, this email, or cool story ideas at rob@robhowell.org. Especially let me know of suggestions you have for the Spotlight section.

Have a great week, everyone.

Rob Howell

Currently Available Works
Shijuren
Four Horsemen Universe
Short Stories

If you think you received this email incorrectly or wish to be unsubscribed, please send an email to shijuren-owner@robhowell.org

Rob’s Update: Fitzalan to Arundel

Week 46 of 2019

Greetings all

I’m a day late on this blog post but I thought that might happen. We had plans last night and I was not able to get the update done before we left.

What did we do? Well, I’m glad you asked. After our first date, I invited my sweetie to go see Colin Mochrie and Brad Sherwood live. They basically do a longer form version of Whose Line is it Anyway, which allows them to do some improved versions of some games and also some other games that are just too long to do in the TV format.

Colin and Brad with my Sweetie
Colin and Brad with my Sweetie

Unfortunately, my sweetie wasn’t able to join me. It was really a shame because I had even gotten the meet & greet tickets. They shook our hands, exchanged a few words, and took a picture. After they took my picture, I explained that my sweetie couldn’t come and I asked if they would take this picture.

Immediately after the show, I texted my sweetie that picture. This was a moment of truth. If she laughed a lot, there was a definite chance for us to last. If she didn’t, well, better to know then.

She laughed. A lot. Still does.

So last night Colin and Brad were in town and we finally got to have our second date. Sadly, there weren’t meet and greet tickets, probably because they’re in Naperville, IL tonight. However, we had a wonderful time. They are really good at this and they have a brilliant way of keeping threads winding through the show. If you have a chance, you should go at least once. The truth is, you can go every night since every show is different.

That was a great conclusion to a good week here. I made a lot of progress with None Call Me Mother. I’m aiming to get a draft to the editor by the end of the year. If I keep going like I am that’ll happen. I worry about the holidays distracting me, but it doesn’t look like we’re going on any long trips.

With the help of my editor Kellie Hultgren, I figured out a problem that’s been nagging at me on a short story. It’s a subtle thing, as the story has a bunch of good elements, but I forgot the Rule of Three. The conclusion seemed tacked on, when in fact I aimed for it all along. That’s an easy fix and I should have that story to the editor by Thanksgiving.

Speaking of short stories, my story Here Must We Hold will come out on 13 December as part of Trouble In the Wind. This is the third of the Phases of Mars military alternate history anthologies and focuses on land combat. I don’t know if James Young and Chris Kennedy will do more, but I’ve had a blast writing these and hope to do more. The first two, Far Better to Dare and In Dark’ning Storms could quite easily be the basis for many more stories. I couldn’t quite get a land story that worked for me, but there are more sea and air stories waiting to happen.

Today, we started putting finishing touches on the floor in the great room. All that’s left is some touch up on the quarter-round, putting in the thresholds, and putting back the outlet covers. Since the bookcases all got moved, we’re also cleaning and oiling the wood-paneled walls. Tomorrow we’ll start putting bookcases back in.

An exciting week as we get closer to things getting done.

What I’m Listening To

I made a slight change here. Many times of late it’s been something other than a song on my playlist so I’m changing the title to match reality.

Anyway, right now, I’m listening to my usual on fall Saturday sort of thing, a college football game. Right now it’s SMU v. Navy. I love watching Navy play. In fact, I love watching every triple option team play. There’s a gorgeous ballet in that offense. It’s limited and only works now because so few run it, but it’s so fun when executed well. It’s perfect for the service academies because it relies on discipline and execution more than athleticism.

Quote of the Week

Today is the birthday of William Fitzalan, 9th earl of Arundel. Who? A player in the War of the Roses, and a name I’m intimately familiar with because of the game Kingmaker. If you’ve played the game, this quote will be quite familiar.

“Piracy: Fitzalan to Arundal, Beaufort to Corfe
Killed: Cromwell, Graystoke
4-1 Victory”
– Kingmaker Card

News and Works in Progress

  • None Call Me Mother (76,951)
  • CB (8,418)
  • AFS (8,163)

Recent Blog Posts and Wiki Additions

Upcoming Events

Spotlight

This week’s spotlight is on William Joseph Roberts, who just released a new book called fLUX Runners. You can find the interview here: https://robhowell.org/blog/?p=1845 and the book at: https://www.amazon.com/fLUX-Runners-William-Joseph-Roberts-ebook/dp/B081M3XKBV/.

Today’s Weight: 394.4

Updated Word Count: 196,635

Shijuren Wiki: 874 entries

Let me know if you have any suggestions on the website, this email, or cool story ideas at rob@robhowell.org. Especially let me know of suggestions you have for the Spotlight section.

Have a great week, everyone.

Rob Howell

Currently Available Works
Shijuren
Four Horsemen Universe
Short Stories

If you think you received this email incorrectly or wish to be unsubscribed, please send an email to shijuren-owner@robhowell.org

Interview: William Joseph Roberts

This week I’m interviewing William Joseph Roberts. Many of you haven’t heard of him until now, but I suspect you will. He’s a real go-getter and I’m looking forward to seeing his entry into a sooper-sekrit project we’re working on.

Interview: William Joseph Roberts
William Joseph Roberts
William Joseph Roberts

What is your quest?

In the end, I strive to create works that are fun, memorable and that evoke a physical or emotional reaction. Nothing beats watching someone read a rough scene and start to gag from what they are reading, then ask where the rest of it is.

fLUX Runners Cover
fLUX Runners Cover

What is your favorite color?

I’ve always liked finding Easter eggs hidden away in a story or game or show. Like the tardis or finding a sperm whale and bowl of petunias in the wasteland in Fallout 1.

What is the average flying speed of an unladen paintbrush?

DISTRACTIONS!  Which really goes back to those evil little demons at the back of our minds telling us that we can’t. So, we snack, we watch a show, we do dishes, or in my case we create a podcast and go down the distraction rabbit hole from hell.  But in the end, everything that I learned while doing the podcast, like networking has paid off in the end.

What are the powers of your personal Holy Hand Grenade?

Research and multitasking. But only if I am able to reign in my brain squirrels and keep them from going down too many internet rabbit holes.

Betty Details
Betty Details

Lightning Round

  • Favorite Muppet? Animal (Rob’s Note: Shocking!)
  • Your Wrestler Name?  Billy Joe Bob (Rob’s Note: Also Shocking!)
  • And Signature Wrestling Move?  Der…. Flying clothes line
  • Favorite Weird Color? Radioactive green
  • How Will You Conquer the World? By cloning myself, if the wife will agree to let me do it.
  • What Cartoon Character Are You? Tasmanian Devil
  • Best Present You’ve Ever Received? Pictures of my kids and grandkids
  • What Do You Secretly Plot? To build a self sufficient underground community
  • Favorite Sports Team?  I have no idea. I’m usually doing something else.
  • Cake or Pie? Strawberry Rhubarb Pie
  • Lime or Lemon? Lime
  • Favorite Chip Dip?  The wife’s black bean dip (Rob’s Note: This could be brought to conventions, you know)
  • Favorite Cereal? Coco Pebbles
  • Favorite Musical Performer We’ve Never Heard Of? Heidivolk Damn good Viking metal
  • Whisky or Whiskey? Neither, Scotch!
  • Favorite Superhero? Lobo
  • Steak Temperature? Hu? Wipe it’s nasty ass, lop off the horns and put it on a plate.
  • Favorite 1970s TV show? Battlestar Galactica
  • Best Thing From the 80s? Starflight
  • Winter, Spring, Summer, or Fall? Fall
  • Favorite Pet? Do kids count?  If not, then the puppers
  • Best Game Ever? Starflight
  • Coffee or Tea? Coffee
  • Sci-Fi or Fantasy? Both
  • Brought to you by the letter: P
Veronica Details
Veronica Details

What question(s) would you like to ask me?

What is your preferred weapon of choice when roaming the lands.

Rob’s Answer: Probably a spear. It’s the one weapon I got pretty good at in the SCA and it’s useful in a variety of ways. Also, as a Fyrdman of Calontir, it’s got a special meaning for me.

Now, if we’re talking life in general, my favorite weapon is politeness and happiness. It’s sort of social judo, I guess. I smile and laugh and often get what I’m hoping for. And if I don’t, I’m at least pleased with how I acted. Of course, the down side is when I lose my temper and act like a jerk I’m that much more pissed at myself.

Betty Heavy Asteroid Miner
Betty Heavy Asteroid Miner

Tell me again where we can find your stuff? 

And where can we find you? (Events and cons you’re scheduled to attend)

  • Chattacon in January
  • AnachroCon in February
  • Fantasci in March
  • Metrotham in May
  • LibertyCon in June
Veronica Heavy Frigate
Veronica Heavy Frigate

Do you have a creator biography?

In a previous lifetime, William Joseph Roberts was an F-15 mechanic and Staff Sergeant in the United States Air Force. He has traveled the world and experienced many things in his few years. During this lifetime, he has been called a Jack of all trades, a Renaissance man and insane squirrel wrangler by his peers.

Since his enlistment ended, he has perused careers as an industrial and architectural designer, design engineer, and now, eclectic writer.

William Joseph Roberts currently resides in the quaint southern town of Chickamauga, Georgia with his loving wife, three freaky-smart nerd children, and small pack of fur babies.

Full blown bio at: https://williamjosephroberts.com/about/


Thanks to William for taking the time to answer my questions.

If you have any suggestions or comments about this interview format, let me know so I can keep tweaking it.

Also, thanks to you for reading. If you’re interested in any of the other interviews I’ve done, you can find them all here: https://robhowell.org/blog/?cat=326. If you are a creator, especially an independent creator, and you want to be spotlighted in a future interview, email me at rob@robhowell.org.

Finally, if you want to join my mailing list, where I’ll announce every interview, as well as what’s going on in my life, go to www.robhowell.org and fill out the form (Name and Email Address) or drop me an email and I’ll add you.

Have a great day.

Rob Howell

NFL All-Time Team (Running Backs)

In honor of the NFL’s 100th season, I’m talking about its best players. For more details and links to all the other positions, click here:  https://robhowell.org/blog/?p=1833.

In this episode I’m talking about running backs. The NFL has chosen 24 finalists for 12 all-time running back spots. Here’s their list, including a small biography of each player: http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000001078454/article/running-back-finalists-announced-for-alltime-team

As mentioned in the main post on the topic, I’m breaking this down into 4 sections. My all-time team, which is organized actually as a team, then the remaining choices I think the NFL should make for their all-time team, then the finalists who don’t make the cut, and finally some interesting players at this position who weren’t finalists.

All-Time Team Roster Choices

Jim Brown is, clearly, the best running back the NFL has ever seen. He averaged more yards per game than anyone else (104.3). He played in an era of 12 or 14 games per season and he quit while he still had years to play. Had he played a few more years and/or played in 16 game seasons, he might still have more yards than anyone else. He led the NFL in rushing in 8 out of 9 years. He  *only* got 996 yards in the other year. In 1963 he *averaged* 133 yards per game, rushing for 6.4 yards per carry. This is ridiculous. He rushed for 5.2 yards per carry for his career. It’s ridiculous. He was also really good at catching passes. He’d be my RB1.

Barry Sanders, ironically, also retired before he had to. As a Cowboys fan it is no shame to say that Emmitt wasn’t as good as Barry. We’ll get to Emmitt soon enough, but Barry averaged more yards per carry and more yards per game. In fact, Barry is second to Brown in yards per game at 99.8. You might note that as good as that number is, it’s 4.5 yards per game less than Brown. Brown is just that far ahead of anyone, but Barry is a worthy next guy down. He’d be the speedy HB type RB2.

Lenny Moore: I’m putting him in the top 12 because of efficiency. He never once led the league in rushing. In fact, he never broke 1000 yards. However, he was the premier pass-catching RB of his time and maybe of all time. He led the league in yards per carry 4 times, 3 times getting 7 yards per carry or more. He led the league in yards per touch 6 times. *Six!* Also, he led the league in yards from scrimmage once. This guy was a huge weapon in the passing game in 50s and 60s, including getting over 70 yards per game in receiving yards for his career. This is my 3rd down back, because I don’t know there’s been a better receiving back ever.

Gale Sayers makes the team because he’s a home run hitter who could attack the other team as a runner, receiver, and returner. He led the NFL in his first 3 years in all-purpose yards. He led the NFL in rushing twice and in yards from scrimmage one of those years. It’s a true shame that he got hurt, because he averaged 5 yards a carry as a runner, 14.5 yards per punt return, and 30 yards per kickoff return, all stellar numbers in his short career. He gets on the team as my hybrid player and return specialist.

He doesn’t qualify as one of the top twelve RBs, but of the remaining players on this list, Bronko Nagurski would be the one I would add if I took a 5th RB on my 53-man roster. He’d be the lead fullback, backup OL, and play on coverage teams. I’ll talk about him more later.

Jim Thorpe would also get consideration here as RB and DB, but he’s tough case as I’ll talk about later. I also kind of think it would be fun to think of him as a gunner on the punt coverage team.

NFL All-Time Team

Eric Dickerson: Some critics thought he wouldn’t succeed because of his upright running style, but I remember how smoothly he glided through defenses. His career faded some at the end, but in his first six years he led the NFL in rushing 4 times, rushing 3 times for more than 1800 yards. I don’t think anyone else has more than that, though OJ Simpson did it twice.

Marshall Faulk: This man dominated as a receiver as well as a RB. Faulk never led the NFL in rushing, but he led the league in Total yards twice. He caught 767 passes, 2nd most among RBs, for 6875 yards, most among RBs. He was also extremely efficient as a RB, leading the league in yards per carry three times and  exceeding 1000 yards 7 times.

Harold “Red” Grange: This is a hard pick to justify because the most we know he rushed for in a year is 277 yards. However, we don’t know what he got in his first 5 years because the stats weren’t kept. However, his impact on the NFL was incredible. It’s not a stretch to say he might be the single most important player to the success of the NFL. It was Grange that turned pro football from a game that only the lower classes played into a game everyone could watch and play without scorn.

Walter Payton: For most of his career, he was the Bears offense. Those teams were bad, but he was consistently good to great, and he is 6th in yards per game at 88 yards per game. He did whatever the team needed. He was skilled at HB option passes at a time when few teams dared anything like that. He even punted once. He was really good catching out of the backfield. I’d take him on my team ahead of Emmitt because he’d have been an amazing special teams player and would adjust to whatever role the team needed. Oddly, though, he only led the league in rushing once, which surprised me when I saw that. Side note: The best offensive player in the NCAA FCS each season receives the Walter Payton Award.

OJ Simpson is a tragic/horrific figure now, but he was an incredibly good RB. In 1973 he rushed for 2003 yards in *14* games. That’s 143 yards per game. From 1972 to 1976 he led the NFL in rushing 4 out of the 5 years. He averaged 110 yards per game during that time. His early years and later years came nowhere close to that peak, but wow he was good during those years.

Emmitt Smith: He did everything well except he was not terribly fast. If he had had breakaway speed he would be up there with Brown, I think. He was, in my mind, the most consistent RB. Sanders got his yards in bigger chunks, with a much higher percentage of negative carries. Smith, on the other hand, relied on consistent positive yardage and 10-20 yard carries. Also, he was a good receiver, and played one of the greatest games I’ve seen a player have. In the final game of 1993, the Cowboys played the Giants where the winner won the division. Emmitt hurt his shoulder, but he kept playing. He owned that game, rushing 32 times for 168 yards with 10 catches for 61 more yards. All this and for most of the game he couldn’t lift his arm above his shoulder. Incredible game.

Thurman Thomas never led the league in rushing yet he’s an easy choice for one of the top 12 because he led the NFL in yards from scrimmage 4 years in a row. He consistently rushed for over 1000 yards (8 years in a row) while also being a major threat as a pass-catcher.

LaDainian Tomlinson was another combination player, leading the league in rushing twice and all-purpose yards in another year. He was an efficient runner and a major threat out of the backfield. He was also efficient as a thrower, running the halfback option 12 times, completing 8 for 7 TDs. That’s really good, actually.

Finalists Who Didn’t Make The Top Team

Marcus Allen: Really good receiving RB, but only exceeding 1000 yards rushing 3 times and only had one great year.

Jerome Bettis: Consistent production, getting over 1000 yards 8 times. However, he only had 1 great year and was not efficient, finishing with a career 3.9 yards per carry.

Earl Campbell: This one surprises me. If you had asked me of the most dominant RBs, he would be right at the top. He led the league in rushing his first three years in the league. However, he’s also a symbol how RBs can get overused. He had over 1400 carries in his first 4 years. His career was never the same. His early years make him a deserving finalist, but I actually picked Thurman Thomas over him.

Earl “Dutch” Clark: It’s really hard to compare players from the early part of the NFL, but I don’t think he gets there. He led the NFL in TDs 3 times, but never led the league in rushing. Used as a passer quite often, but not particularly good at it, even for the era. He was also a tremendous defensive back, leading the NFL in interceptions twice. Hard to figure his place here.

Tony Dorsett: I really thought about him on the all-time roster above even though he never led the league in rushing. However, he was one of the greatest home run hitters in NFL history. I don’t know that he’s the only person to have both a run of over 90 yards and a catch of over 90 yards in his career. I also don’t know that he’s not. Tom Landry controlled his carries so he never got huge raw numbers, but that might have extended his career. Certainly, he remained efficient to later in his career.

Franco Harris: Like Bettis, he was really consistent, but rarely excellent. Led the league in TDs in 1976. That’s his only time leading the league. A deserved Hall of Famer, but because he was very good for a long time, not because he was dominant.

Hugh McElhenny: Here was an underrated player. Breakaway speed meant he was a threat as a receiver and returner as well as a rusher. His receiving stats in the 1950s were astounding, and he finished with 264 catches for 12.3 yards per catch. That’s really really good. However, he never led the NFL is rushing, though he did lead it in average in his rookie year.

Marion Motley: He’s a hard one to judge. He only led the league in rushing twice, never exceeding 1000 yards. However, he was a star for a Cleveland Browns team that won the title six times in a row. I think he’s a hell of a player, but I don’t think he makes the cut.

Bronko Nagurski: A great player and a versatile one. He’d actually be on my list of top players in NFL history, but not top RBs. He actually was a top-flight tackle for a while and a tough linebacker. I’d want him on my team, no doubt, but it’s hard to put him as one of the best RBs because the highest total he achieved in a year that we know of is 586. He might have gotten more, but we don’t have yardage totals for his first two years. Side note: The best defender in the NCAA each season receives the Bronko Nagurski Award.

Adrian Peterson: A great RB, and one who led the league in rushing three times. Yet I don’t think he quite matches up with the rest. He had some great years but injuries and inconsistency put him in this tier as opposed to the top tier. I suspect recency bias will make him one of the top 12 chosen, but I’d rather have those listed above over him.

Jim Taylor: A great player who was a part of some amazing Packer teams, winning the title 5 times. He led the league in rushing once, and had 5 years of over 1000 yards. He just doesn’t quite make the cut. However, he might very well be the 2nd best fullback of all-time behind Brown.

Steve Van Buren: I originally put him in the top section. He didn’t have a long career, but man was he good, especially for his era. He led the league in rushing 4 times in his first 6 years. He eclipsed 1000 yards twice at a time when the season was only 10 or 12 games. He led the league in yards per game 5 years in a row. A dominant player during his time. However, I bumped him in favor of Gale Sayers because of all-purpose yards.

Interesting Players to Remember

These include some players who aren’t necessarily the greatest, but have some intriguing qualities.

Larry Centers: A fantastic fullback who got more receptions as a RB than anyone else.

Jamaal Charles: Incredibly efficient as a rusher, getting 5.4 yards per carry for his career. Amazing.

Paddy Driscoll: We have almost no stats for the guy, but he was selected as 1st Team All-Pro 6 times in the 20s. Also the first All-Pro QB (yes, QB, it was a different time) in NFL history.

Frank Gifford: Not really close to being one of the finalists, but it’s fun to remember how good he was as an all-purpose back before becoming a great announcer.

Priest Holmes: Had a ridiculous 3 year stretch with over 2000 yards from scrimmage each year and 2 years of over 20 rushing TDs.

Bo Jackson: If he had stayed healthy and played only football, he might have been Jim Brown. Maybe even better. Averaged 5.4 yards per carry for his career.

Curtis Martin: one of the most consistent RBs ever. Never a big game-breaker, his only averaged 4.0 yards per carry. Only led the NFL in rushing once. However, he was over 1000 yards 10 straight years. In those 10 years he had at least 1456 total yards each year. What a player.

Ernie Nevers: We have no idea how many yards he got as records weren’t kept. Also, he only played 5 years. However, he was a scoring machine, in one case scoring all 40 points for the Chicago Cardinals.

Joe Perry: A dominant RB in the late 40s and 50s. Led the league in yards twice.

Darren Sproles: Whaaa? I can hear you all asking about this. However, this guy got a ton of all-purpose yards, including the most ever in a single year and 4 of the top 60 years all-time. A fantastic receiver, a slippery runner (4.9 yards per carry for his career), and a terrifying punt returner.

Jim Thorpe: What to do with him? He was clearly one of the greatest football players of all time and in the discussion for best athlete ever. However, none of his rushing stats were recorded and he was 33 the first year of the NFL. That meant his best years were long gone by the time we actually have an NFL. We have no good way to judge his career using statistics, meaning we have to used anecdotal evidence. He may not have been a great NFL player, given his age when the league starting, but it’s hard not to think he doesn’t have a place in the all-time team somewhere. We might see him appear in the DB list, but I doubt it. Side note: he was actually the NFL’s first president while actually playing. Side note two: The best DB in the NCAA each season receives the Jim Thorpe Award.

Doak Walker: Was a better college player than NFL RB, but he was a prolific kicker as well as a solid RB. Averaged 4.9 yards per carry and 16.7 yards per reception. He was also a very good returner and a solid defensive back. Side note: The best RB in the NCAA each season receives the Doak Walker Award.

NFL All-Time Team Main Post

This is the NFL’s 100th season and, rightfully, they’re doing a bunch of things to celebrate the past century. As part of this, they’re selecting an all-time team. I’m going to join in and, generally speaking, follow their format.

Below is how they’re constructing their team. If the position is a hyperlink, it will take you to my discussion on the position.

Offense

  • Quarterbacks: 10
  • Running Backs: 12
  • Wide Receivers: 10
  • Tight Ends: 5
  • Tackles: 7
  • Guards: 7
  • Centers: 4

Defense

  • Defensive Ends: 7
  • Defensive Tackles: 7
  • Linebackers: 12 (6 MLB/ILB; 6 OLB)
  • Cornerbacks: 7
  • Safeties: 6
  • Kickers: 2
  • Punters: 2
  • Kick Returners: 2

They have announced the 24 finalists for running back, so I’m guessing they’ll have twice the number serve as finalists for each position. I’m going to go through each position and make my choices out of their finalists.

I’ll organize each position in four sections. First, I’ll list the players who are I think should be on the all-time NFL who make my all-time team. Unlike the NFL, I’m actually going to build a roster, so I might choose lesser players at times who can do more for a team. Second, I’ll list the remaining players who I  think should make the NFL’s all-time team in alphabetical order. Then I’ll list the finalists who don’t make the cut. Finally, I’ll list a few players that might have been finalists or who are interesting for some reason.

Mag Review: Imaginative Tales (September, 1955)

Greetings all

I’m looking forward to this week’s magazine review, unlike last week’s. This one is not filled with any classic stories and there’s no Asimov, Heinlein, or Clarke, but all the stories were solid and filled with action. There’s one exception. It isn’t a classic, but the last story should be.

Table of Contents: http://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/pl.cgi?183245

Imaginative Tales (9/55) Cover
Imaginative Tales (9/55) Cover

I suspected I was going to enjoy this issue when I read the first words of the editorial by William L. Hamling. “An action story is more popular than any other type” (4). Previously, Imaginative Tales had focused on humorous stories, but they shifted their editorial focus starting in this one on action.

I like it, especially since it’s how I try to write.

By the way, Hamling had an interesting career. As an editor, he kept buying a poor artist’s fantasy cartoons. The cartoons weren’t very good and so Hamling never published them, but the artist needed the money. In 1953, the artist came to Hamling with a magazine idea. Hamling replied, “You can’t sell sex to the American public.” That artist was Hugh Hefner. Safe to say Hamling was wrong and Hefner stopped being poor.

Last week, I mentioned that this issue did something I wish they all did. It’s a simple Introducing the Author essay. Basically, they asked Dwight V. Swain to tell us about himself. It’s much like my weekly interviews, and I really enjoy getting to know the authors as people, especially ones I’m not terribly familiar with. In this case, it’s located inside the front and back covers, but I don’t really care where they would have placed it, given that inside the covers is such prime advertising territory, but I would have loved to have seen this sort of thing done routinely.

Swain’s story Terror Station is the cover story. I’d never read anything by him before, but I’ll remember the name. Terror Station is about a secret project in the desert. Stone, the project’s security officer, is returning to the facility when he sees a woman in the night running toward his car followed by some strange monster. He kills the monster, but the woman is dead. Guards from the lab rush up and immediately arrest him for killing her, much to his frustration.

Fury comes later when his expectations of the whole thing getting cleared up get squashed by everyone in the base thinking he’s guilty. None of these people, who were all friends and colleagues would give him any benefit of the doubt. To Stone it’s like they’re all filled with paranoia and fear which hadn’t been there when he left.

They send him to Reva, the psychologist, who happens to be one of Stone’s exes. She, at least, tries to help. In so doing, she discovers that he had once had encephalitis. In turn, he discovers why she’s there. The project wouldn’t have had a psychologist except she had her own work.

Stone discovers that her portion of the project is creating that fear and paranoia. He disables the device and all is back to normal, except they wonder at the source of the technology. Stone discovers that it comes from aliens who have landed near the base.

The manager of the project, MacDougal, it turns out, has been in league with these aliens. His project was going nowhere until they arrived, and he was afraid his career was about to crash and burn. He took bits of their technology to show his superiors that he was making progress while in turn helping the aliens.

What the aliens want is for us to capture all the krypton out of the air (about 1ppm) and give it to them as they use it for their technology. According to the story, though, what they want is for humanity to kill itself because krypton’s job is to keep our atmosphere intact. If we gave it to them, they could come back later to a dead planet, which to them would be a great joke.

Stone thwarts the aliens, figures out MacDougal’s part, and confronts him. MacDougal, however, has the drop on him and is about to kill him when Reva shoots him with Stone’s gun which she had picked up in an earlier fight. They then walk off, hand in hand.

A good, rip-roaring yarn, exactly like Hamling said he wanted.

Next is Coffin for Two by Winston K. Marks. Marks is another author I’d never read before, but I liked this story. A man returns from three years off Earth mining on Venus. Upon his return, he sees marked changes.

First, most people are walking around with a star on their forehead. Also, he finds his girl now making time with one of their friends. They get into a bit of a scuffle and his friend, who had never been much of an athlete, beats the heck out of the miner. Then the crew decides to go party to celebrate his return. On the way, the lead cab gets destroyed by a passing driver. His friends agree its too bad, because they would have enjoyed the party.

Too bad! The miner thinks two friends have just been killed and it’s “too bad?” It turns out that in the time he’s been gone, they’ve figured out a way to let people rest in a life support chamber (called coffins) and have their brain implant an automaton (called proxies) marked with a red star. His friends haven’t died, but they’ll take a bit of time to get another proxy.

At first, he is completely against the idea of getting his own proxy, but the friend who was now dating his old flame beats him up again. So he goes and gets fitted out. He hides the fact he’s using a proxy and confronts the old friend. Once the friend tries to kill him, he reveals he’s using a proxy and tells the friend to scram.

Now the old flame, who preferred the miner anyway, is waiting for an offer of marriage. However, he hesitates. He wanted to marry her three years ago, but how do proxies get married? Why, the share a coffin for two.

Following that is The Invisible Enemy by Jerry Sohl. Sohl is yet another write I hadn’t read before in this issue. This story is about a rescue attempt on another planet. The planet is a desert planet, out on the frontier, and the exploration vessel that came to it never left. Its crew vanished without a trace. A second ship came to look and the same thing happened to it.

Now comes a third ship. This one has a much larger crew and also includes a brand new computer with its own operator. Unfortunately, the commander of the ship despises the new equipment and scorn the operator as a mere civilian.

At first, his scorn is partially justified. The computer provides no answers, merely saying it has insufficient data. The crew starts exploring. And then they start disappearing, much like the crews of the previous ships. However, there’s nothing left behind. No shred of evidence.

Then, one of the crew is saved, briefly, from one of the attacks. He dies in the ship’s medical bay, raving of monsters. The commander insists that he give the boy a proper burial.

The computer now has sufficient data and says this is not advised. The tech goes to the commander and urges him not to follow through on the burial, but the commander ignores him and scorns the computer’s “advice.” He confines the tech to his quarters and continues with the burial.

However, the burial is a massacre. There are creatures swimming in the sand who are incredibly sensitive to the smell of blood. They scent the body and eat all the rest of the crew while the tech watches in horror. Then his horror is all the greater as he wonders if he can leave his quarters or is trapped here until he dies. Fortunately, the executive officer had believed him and left the door unlocked so he can flee the planet.

De-sert shark, do do, d-doo d-doo…

Henry Slesar’s The Brat is next. Really good story, with one of Slesar’s common twist endings. I become more and more a fan of Slesar with every story.

In this one, an alien is brought back to Earth for study. When the doctor examining alien died, the alien fled. They eventually found him in Nebraska, happily married with children.

Not everyone is happy about this, especially a hate group led by a man named Turesco. He is obsessed with finding all of these offspring before the alien, who can clearly interbreed with humans, corrupts our blood. They track down two, one who has mostly alien characteristics and a brat, who mostly looks human. They kill one and take one away.

However, the only way they can do this is with help from the government. A protector first class named Ward is assigned to the case and it is his suggestion that finally brings the two boys to bay. He does everything he can to save them, but Turesco and his men are just too much.

Then, at the least, we see that Ward also has those alien characteristics, albeit weaker. Turesco and his vision of “purity” is long past any hope of success.

What a great way to turn a crappy ending into a “villain gets his comeuppance” ending.

Last is Buck and the Space War by Mack Reynolds. I loved this story. When I saw it in the table of contents I immediately wondered if it was a Buck Rogers story, so I was excited to check it out. It’s not, but it might even be better.

It’s about a guy named Buck to whom the strangest things happen. If he goes fishing and doesn’t catch anything, it’s because a sea serpent swamp up the St. Johns River. That sort of thing.

Buck lives in Dupont, Florida, north of Orlando, south of Jacksonville. He’s a complete hick and he decides one day to go to Lake Dexter get him a mess of squirrels.

I’m going to stop here and say that Reynolds’ use of language in this story is fantastic. The story is light-hearted in many ways, and the specific words he chooses adds to the humor. Like “mess of squirrels.” Had Buck just wanted a few squirrels he could have stayed close to home, but he wanted a “mess.”

Anyway, squirrel hunting involves sitting and waiting until squirrels come to the hunter. Buck, being Buck, never gets a chance at a squirrel. Instead a damaged spaceship crashes on one side of the clearing where he waited. A small alien pops out and runs to a depression. A second spaceship lands and another alien, also small, pops out and the two start firing at each other.

Buck’s had enough of this, especially since he was sort of in the middle anyway. He picks up one of the aliens and carries him over to the other. He sets them down and asks what’s going on. One is a Martian, the other a Venusian, and the two have been battling for millennia. He  tells them to stop with all this foolishness. He talks about treating people as you’d wish to be treated and overrides their protests about the other guy.

The two take notes and he sends them off back to Mars and Venus. There they take his words of wisdom, leaving him with the title of Holy One. The presumption at the end is that he ends the ancient war because the two take his backwoods common sense back to their planets as the root of a new religion.

It’s silly and impractical. There’s no way these events could actually end a war spanning thousands of years. But who cares? It’s a fun story and you really like Buck.

Again, this isn’t a great issue. There’s no Foundation story or anything like that. It is, however, exactly what Hamling aimed for. A magazine with lots of action, good stories that you want to find out what’s going on, and heroes you can root for.

Good stuff.

Next week I’ll review the Fantastic Universe from July, 1955. I’m excited because there’s stories by a number of good writers including Philip K. Dick and Murray Leinster. See you next week!

Next Week’s Issue: http://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/pl.cgi?89716


If you have any comments or would like to request I keep my eyes open for a specific issue or month, feel free to comment here or send an email to me at: rob@robhowell.org.

If you want to see previous reviews, the Mag Review category is here: https://robhowell.org/blog/?cat=432.

Have a great day.

Rob Howell

Rob’s Update: Venturing to Carry

Week 45 of 2019

Greetings all

It’s been a good week here. I wrote over 8000 words overall, which is more than I’ve been able to crank out in a week in a while. I’m definitely regaining the rhythm I had in the spring.

The big chunk of writing was major progress in None Call Me Mother. I broke the 70k mark today, and I made progress in multiple threads. Some days it’s a fight to get words going on one thread, but today, the writing prompted me to make sure I filled in a blank in another, which led to another.

That’s always fun.

I also added 800 or so words to Here Must We Hold. This was my submission for Trouble in the Wind, the next entry in the Phases of Mars series of alternate military history. Unlike Far Better to Dare and In Dark’ning Storms, this story is set in Anglo-Saxon England. I am pleased to announce that it has been accepted and these new words were actually historical notes.

For a moment, writing those notes, I sort of felt like Bernard Cornwell. That was fun too.

Tonight it’s puttering around the house, watching the Blues play, and drinking Beer Barrel Bourbon. It’s actually one of my favorite bourbons and I’ve been frustrated because I couldn’t find it. Tonight, I was disappointed not to see it yet again. Then I started looking at all the choices, trying to figure out something to try.

Turns out they changed not just the label, but the bottle shape as well. I probably just didn’t see it… again and again. But I have some now, and guess what? Good bourbon is yet more fun.

Y’all have a good week.

Current Playlist Song

The dulcet tones of John Kelly, Bernie Federko, and Darren Pang calling the Blues game. It’s 2-2 in the 3rd at the moment.

Side note: I’ve been a fan of the Blues since, frankly, a terrifying moment in the Kiel Center in 1988 or so. I never really thought anything about them going into last year’s playoffs. A friend of mine who’s a big hockey fan said before they won their first series that he actually thought they had a real chance. I thought he was crazy. He might have been, but one Stanley Cup later, he’s my kind of crazy.

Quote of the Week

In 534 on this day, Justinian published his law code. It’s one of the great legal documents of history. Here’s the first section.

“The Emperor Justinian to the Senate of the City of Constantinople. Those things which seem to many former Emperors to require correction, but which none of them ventured to carry into effect, We have decided to accomplish at the present time with the assistance of Almighty God; and to diminish litigation by the revision of the multitude of constitutions which are contained in the Three Codes; namely, the Gregorian, the Hermogenian, and the Theodosian, as well as in those other Codes promulgated after them by Theodosius of Divine Memory, and by other Emperors, who succeeded him, in addition to those which We Ourselves have promulgated, and to combine them in a single Code, under Our auspicious name, in which compilation should be included not only the constitutions of the three above-mentioned Codes, but also such new ones as subsequently have been promulgated.”
– Justinian (Codex Justinianeus, Preface)

News and Works in Progress

  • None Call Me Mother (70,029)
  • CB (8,418)
  • AFS (8,088)

Recent Blog Posts and Wiki Additions

Upcoming Events

Spotlight

This week’s spotlight is once again on J.F. Holmes and his new shared world, JTF 13. You can find his interview here: https://robhowell.org/blog/?p=1814 and JTF 13: Origins at: https://www.amazon.com/ORIGINS-Joint-Task-Force-Anthology-ebook/dp/B07YR4QR18/.

Today’s Weight: 392.4

Updated Word Count: 189,665

Shijuren Wiki: 874 entries

Let me know if you have any suggestions on the website, this email, or cool story ideas at rob@robhowell.org. Especially let me know of suggestions you have for the Spotlight section.

Have a great week, everyone.

Rob Howell

Currently Available Works
Shijuren
Four Horsemen Universe
Short Stories

If you think you received this email incorrectly or wish to be unsubscribed, please send an email to shijuren-owner@robhowell.org

Mag Review: Galaxy (April, 1963)

Frankly, this was probably my least favorite issue I’ve read so far. I didn’t care for any of the stories except one, none of the ads were fun, and nothing else appealed to me. Hence, I’m just going to give you a cursory review. I’ve got things to write in None Call Me Mother instead of drearily going over these stories.

Table of Contents: http://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/pl.cgi?58435

Galaxy (4/63) Cover
Galaxy (4/63) Cover

The cover story is The Visitor at the Zoo by Damon Knight. You know Knight at least because of To Serve Man, a fantastic short story from 1950. Visitor was not his best effort. The cause of the conflict is never adequately explained, it ran too long, and the twist at the end was predictable.

Worse, I can’t root for the main character. He’s a moderately intelligent alien in a zoo who has his brain somehow transplanted into the mind of a passing journalist. We are meant to root for him because he’s got a chance to get out of the zoo where he had been trapped. I empathized with that aspect, but the journalist was simply an innocent tourist, who lost everything. There’s little in the story of sympathy for him, and in the end, the creature chooses not to exchange positions and return to the way it was.

I can both reject the legitimacy of the zoo and at the same time despise the selfishness of the main character. And I do. I said this wasn’t Knight’s best effort. I sure hope it was his worst, because I really disliked it.

On the Fourth Planet by J.F. Bone was the only story to be reprinted often. It was about an alien struggling for life in a desolate world with the remnants of his people. It’s a hard life, and the law doesn’t allow for much leniency. Unfortunately for this alien, he runs into an object that hasn’t been there before. It fills him with food and hope. It also returns to him the cellular memory of his people, suggesting a way they can grow out of their barbarism. As you can probably guess by the title, it’s a NASA rocket that has landed on Mars.

The best story of the lot, by far. However, it’s not a great one, just a good solid story that in a better issue would have seemed like a nice supporting piece. Here, it was drug down by the awful cover story.

I suspect I’ll really like the June 1963 issue, if I every run into it. It has stories by Clifford D. Simak, Gordon R. Dickson, Keith Laumer, and John Jakes. This issue, however, was not my cup of tea.

Next week I’ll review the Imaginative Tales from September, 1955. It has a story by Mack Reynolds and an interesting thing I wish more magazines had done.

Next Week’s Issue: http://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/pl.cgi?183245


If you have any comments or would like to request I keep my eyes open for a specific issue or month, feel free to comment here or send an email to me at: rob@robhowell.org.

If you want to see previous reviews, the Mag Review category is here: https://robhowell.org/blog/?cat=432.

Have a great day.

Rob Howell

Rob’s Update: O It’s Tommy This, an’ Tommy That

Week 44 of 2019

Greetings all

From a writing standpoint this was a 2 steps forward, 1 step backward kind of week. I went through a significant chunk of None Call Me Mother and cleaned it up.

I also did some plotting and figured out yet one more piece of the puzzle to get all the actors in the final scene.  I expect to see a huge step next week.

I’ve also started an editing project that I’ll talk more about in December.

We’re working on the house, as I often do in November. We got rid of carpet in our great room and have been laying bamboo flooring. The carpet was original, 1983 vintage, and it had seen more than a few battles.

Going to try and knock out a few more words tonight, so I hope everyone has a good weekend.

Current Playlist Song

Instead of music, I worked on this while watching Chris and Sheellah showing old pictures on their weekly CKP Facetime session. If you’re a fan of the Four Horsemen Universe, the Fallen World, or anything put out by Chris Kennedy Publishing, it’s a great way to interact with them.

Quote of the Week

This week’s quote comes from Kipling in honor of Veteran’s Day. Here’s the whole poem: https://www.poetryloverspage.com/poets/kipling/tommy.html.

O it’s Tommy this, an’ Tommy that, an’ “Tommy, go away”;
But it’s “Thank you, Mister Atkins”, when the band begins to play,
The band begins to play, my boys, the band begins to play,
O it’s “Thank you, Mister Atkins”, when the band begins to play.
Rudyard Kipling, Tommy

News and Works in Progress

  • None Call Me Mother (63,637)
  • CB (8,418)
  • AFS (8,088)

Recent Blog Posts and Wiki Additions

Upcoming Events

Spotlight

This week’s spotlight is on J.F. Holmes and his new shared world, JTF 13. You can find his interview here: https://robhowell.org/blog/?p=1814 and JTF 13: Origins at: https://www.amazon.com/ORIGINS-Joint-Task-Force-Anthology-ebook/dp/B07YR4QR18/

Today’s Weight: 394.4

Updated Word Count: 187,467

Shijuren Wiki: 874 entries

Let me know if you have any suggestions on the website, this email, or cool story ideas at rob@robhowell.org. Especially let me know of suggestions you have for the Spotlight section.

Have a great week, everyone.

Rob Howell

Currently Available Works
Shijuren
Four Horsemen Universe
Short Stories

If you think you received this email incorrectly or wish to be unsubscribed, please send an email to shijuren-owner@robhowell.org

Interview: J.F. Holmes

Greetings all

This week’s interview is with J.F. Holmes. He is a really talented military science fiction author and editor. He’s just released the first of a large shared project called JTF 13. I’m really looking forward to seeing how that universe evolves. I especially love its tagline: “They hold the line… between heaven and hell.

Interview: J.F. Holmes

Rob Howell’s Interview Questions

Irregular Scout Team One: Missions
Irregular Scout Team One: Missions

What is your quest?

My quest is to tell the story. I have a boundless imagination, fueled by Tolkien and Asimov, and there are dozens of stories running through my head at any time. Show me an object and I will, on the spot, make up a story about it. So I guess you can say that I need to get it all out.

What is your favorite color?

1968 Ford Green, as painted on a Mustang. I like to tell a story by character interaction and character action. I hate information dumps; I’d rather know by what a person does or says.

What is the average flying speed of an unladen paint brush?

Well, one thing I’ve learned is to follow the Soviet Army doctrine. Reward success, starve failure. If I write a book that maybe I loved but didn’t do well in the market place, then I doubt I’ll ever do a follow up.

Valkyrie Rebellion
Valkyrie Rebellion

What are the powers of your personal Holy Hand Grenade?

Small unit interaction and combat. Both of which are about the people involved in them, nothing else. How do they feel? What emotions are driving their actions? When people ask me about Irregular Scout Team One, I tell them that it’s not about the post apocalyptic world, it’s about the Team.

Lightning Round

  • Favorite Muppet? Kermit. Deep down he’s a smart ass.
  • Your Wrestler Name? Couch Potato
  • And Signature Wrestling Move? Intellectual bafflement. (Rob’s Note: “From the top rope!!!”)
  • Favorite Weird Color? 1968 Ford Green
  • How Will You Conquer the World? I already have, by bringing the world down to my size.
  • What Cartoon Character Are You? Bugs Bunny.
  • Best Present You’ve Ever Received? My Executive Vice President of Happiness for my company, AKA my significant other, Karen. And my two sons, who are good, decent men.
  • What Do You Secretly Plot? Novels. Many Novels.
  • Favorite Sports Team? NY Yankees. Since I was small kid growing up in Long Island.
  • Cake or Pie? Cake.
  • Lime or Lemon? Chocolate
  • Favorite Chip Dip?  Buffalo Ranch
  • Favorite Musical Performer We’ve Never Heard Of? Count Hans Von Haffenpepper, who invented the electric glockenspiel in 1734. A man way ahead of his time.
  • Whisky or Whiskey? I gave up drinking at aged 21 when I realized it made me do really stupid stuff.
  • Favorite Superhero? Superman
  • Favorite Weird Color? 1968 Ford Green
  • Steak Temperature? Well.
  • Favorite 1970s TV show? Battlestar Galactica
  • Best Thing From the 80s? EVERYTHING. You children do not know what the awesomeness of the 1980’s was. And Madonna.
  • Winter, Spring, Summer, or Fall? Thanks, now that song is stuck in my head. (Rob’s Note: You’re welcome)
  • Favorite Pet?  My neighbor’s dog.
  • Best Game Ever? D & D, Axis & Allies, Red Storm Rising, TACOPS
  • Coffee or Tea? Tea
  • Sci-Fi or Fantasy? Sci-Fi
  • Brought to you by the letter ___? Q, because Q invents all kinds of cool stuff
JTF 13: Origins
JTF 13: Origins

What question(s) would you like to ask me? 

What is best in life?

Rob’s Answer: To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women!

Second best: Being paid to write stories in the tradition of Robert E. Howard, J.R.R. Tolkien, Robert Heinlein, and so many others. 

Tell me again where we can find your stuff? 

And where can we find you?

So far only Libertycon this year.

Do you have a creator biography?

J.F. Holmes is a retired Army Senior Noncommissioned Officer, having served for 22 years in both the Regular Army and Army National Guard. During that time, he served as everything from an artillery section leader to a member of a Division level planning staff, with tours in Cuba and Iraq, as well as responding to the terrorists attacks in NYC on 9-11.

From 2010 to 2014 he wrote the immensely popular military cartoon strip, “Power Point Ranger”, poking fun at military life in the tradition of Beetle Bailey and Willy & Joe.

His books range from Military Sci-Fi to Space Opera to Detective to Fantasy, with a lot in between, and in 2017 two are finalists for the prestigious Dragon Awards. As of August 2017, Mr. Holmes has eighteen books and two novellas published.

In 2018, he launched Cannon Publishing, www.cannonpublishing.us specializing in anthologies and works from up and coming authors.

Final question for you: What should I have asked but did not? 

You should have asked if I had any any idea what I was getting into? My answer: No.


Thanks to John for taking the time to answer my questions.

If you have any suggestions or comments about this interview format, let me know so I can keep tweaking it.

Also, thanks to you for reading. If you’re interested in any of the other interviews I’ve done, you can find them all here: https://robhowell.org/blog/?cat=326. If you are a creator, especially an independent creator, and you want to be spotlighted in a future interview, email me at rob@robhowell.org.

Finally, if you want to join my mailing list, where I’ll announce every interview, as well as what’s going on in my life, go to www.robhowell.org and fill out the form (Name and Email Address) or drop me an email and I’ll add you.

Have a great day.

Rob Howell